#“it's about relationships that people have... not necessarily with girlfriends or... uh...”

[darklylovely]

was watching some more older stuff and found this video where noel talks about what several of their earlier songs mean/are about, and this is what he had to say about 'live forever' then:

"only two best friends would say that to each other, or twins maybe."

[kikyoupdates]

Girlfriend-For-Hire ⭑˚🦋⭑ 𝟶𝟷

yandere!ocs x f!reader

yandere, reverse harem, yandere reverse harem, original characters x fem!reader, slowburn, slowburn yandere

Hoping to try something new and earn a bit of money on the side, you join an app that lets people hire you for your dating services. The idea is pretty straightforward — you pose as the client's girlfriend for a brief period of time, and in turn, you receive payment. But you didn't foresee everyone getting so attached to you, and suddenly, they're no longer satisfied with a fabricated relationship.

story masterlist | next

“...you can do what now?”

“Hire someone to date you,” your friend, Ava, repeats. She chuckles and waves you off dismissively. “Come on, [Name]. It’s the modern age. People are always coming up with new things these days. I’m willing to bet there’s an app or website out there for practically anything.”

You blink in disbelief. Granted, there is all kinds of crazy shit going on in the world, and you’ve heard of companionship services before—like escorts or sugar baby arrangements—but to hear that something like this is trending nowadays is still undeniably a shock. 

“Here, look,” Ava gestures, pulling out her phone. “I was curious, so I downloaded the app the other day just to check out.” 

“Uh, don’t you already have a boyfriend?”

“He knows I was just browsing. I showed him too, and we scrolled through some stuff together. A lot of the profiles on here are wild,” she laughs. “It’s crazy what people advertise they’re willing to do. Get a load of this guy. He says he’s down to meet your family and make a total ass out of himself just so that he lowers your parents’ standards and the next real boyfriend you get will look way better by comparison.”

“Fucking hell,” you mutter. “I can’t tell if this is actually real, or just some new meme template.” 

“Of course it’s real! I think you’re underestimating how lonely people these days are. There’s definitely a lot of money to be made in this industry. Just look at how much people are willing to blow on their favorite streamer, even though they’ve never met them a day in their life. Dating’s gotten a lot more complicated lately, so I guess some people just want to skip past the troublesome parts and experience what it’s like to be with someone.” 

You furrow your brows. The whole thing sounds incredibly sad when you think of it that way. People would rather pay for a fabricated relationship than put in the time and effort towards building something real? Loneliness is starting to sound like an actual epidemic nowadays. 

“Well, I guess I shouldn’t judge people without understanding where they’re coming from,” you acknowledge. “It’s not like I know what they’ve been through. Times are changing and all. It sounds like this is actually starting to become pretty mainstream.” 

Ava nods chipperly. “Yep! I mean, I love my boyfriend, so I’m definitely not the target audience, but maybe it’s what some people need to gain a little boost of confidence and get back into the dating scene. I doubt everyone uses it in a romantic sense too. There are people out there that just want a bit of company every now and then. Isn’t it nice that they have someone to spend time with this way?” 

“Yeah… I guess that’s true.” 

Honestly, you’re still struggling to fully wrap your head around this. You understand the premise well enough, but you can’t really get past the part about accepting payment just to provide someone with a fabricated experience. Then again, you suppose that’s the case for most things nowadays. People are willing to spend the brunt of their earnings on in-game purchases for video games and other things that aren’t tangible in the real world, because even though they aren’t necessarily organic, it still provides them with some satisfaction. 

Long story short, it’s not up to you to decide what does or doesn’t make someone else happy, and you suppose as long as it’s executed in a professional manner, there’s nothing wrong with meeting new people this way. 

“Hey, I’ve got a great idea,” Ava suddenly perks up. “You should join this app! You’re super pretty, smart, and nice. I bet you’d have loads of guys lining up to hire you as their girlfriend!”

“Me?” You blink repeatedly, shuffling backwards the closer she leans in. “I mean, I just don’t think I’m the right person for the job. If it makes people happy, then I support it, but deep down, I worry I’d feel like I’m exploiting someone’s feelings just for a few extra bucks. Morally speaking, I’m not so sure I like the idea…” 

“It’s not exploitation,” she insists. “People know what they’re signing up for. At the end of the day, it’s a buyer-seller relationship. Someone pays for the service being advertised, and they receive it. As long as you’re not ambiguous about what you’re willing to do for the amount that you’re charging, people know what to expect. Of course, I’m sure there might be the occasional asshole here and there, but if they do anything inappropriate or violate the terms, you can report them through the app and they’ll be banned from using it.” 

You’re not quite sure how to respond to that. Some extra money would be nice. You’re a university student with all sorts of loans, so it’s not like you’ve got excess cash lying around. And it’s also true that you’ve been looking to apply for a new job lately, since your old manager was a total ass and you ended up quitting. 

Still. A girlfriend-for-hire? Someone like you? It’s just really difficult to imagine. 

“I actually think it’d be a good experience,” Ava goes on. “You’ve never really put yourself out there before. I know everyone dates at their own pace and stuff, but you shouldn’t have to be afraid. Who knows? Maybe you’ll meet some cool people and want to date them for real. And even if you don’t end up going for them, you still make some money, so either way, you’ve got nothing to lose.”

You chuckle weakly. “Yeah, I just don’t know. I feel like I’m better suited for traditional jobs. But thanks for the vote of confidence. I’m glad you think people would actually be willing to pay to date me.” 

“Girl, you seriously need to believe in yourself more,” Ava sighs. “I’m telling you, you’re a catch. But at the end of the day, it’s your call. You shouldn’t force yourself into anything if you feel uncomfortable.”

You smile and nod in agreement, and sensing your discomfort, Ava decides to change the topic.

But for some reason, you feel a twinge in your chest, and it’s hard to keep your mind from wandering.

Later that same day, you’re lounging on the couch, mouth agape, having just downloaded the app on your own phone. 

“What the hell am I doing…?” 

You tell yourself that it’s just simple curiosity. Yeah. That’s all it is. Ava piqued your interest earlier, and now you just want to scroll through in more detail to get a better sense of what kind of people use this platform. 

The app is called ‘Partner For Hire’. The name isn’t particularly inspired, you have to admit, but you suppose it communicates its point rather effectively and leaves no room for ambiguity. Ultimately, this is a transactional relationship, and it’s probably for the best that clients know what to expect. 

You can use the app as either a buyer or seller. Meaning that you can create your profile and advertise your services, or simply list yourself as a prospective client and what your hobbies and interests are. In that sense, it’s kind of similar to most dating apps, since you have to take a flattering photo to go along with whatever blurb you’re providing. Of course, just because you try to solicit someone’s services doesn’t mean there’s any guarantee they’ll accept. This is an app where you can run everything yourself, and of course the company takes a cut of your profits, rather than an agency that matches you with a client regardless of whether you want to accept the job or not. 

There’s definitely a lot of flexibility, and you can easily choose who you want to pretend to date. If someone is interested in hiring you, they submit a request to be able to contact you, and once you accept, you can message them directly and establish the terms of the dating contract, such as the length and what particular services will be provided. 

You scroll through the list of boyfriends/girlfriends being advertised on the app, and honestly, it seems like there’s a decent amount of money to be made. Of course, a lot of that comes with building a good reputation and improving your ratings and visibility so more people will want to hire you, but it actually seems like a decent amount of people are able to make a living off this sort of thing. 

You bite down on your lower lip. Should you really go ahead and just do it? Like Ava said, there’s probably not much to lose. All the transactions are managed on the app, so you can easily report people who try to skip out on paying. Clients have to link their banking and personal info, so they’d be taking on a big risk by trying to scam people. You’re sure it might happen from time to time, but based on the reviews you’ve read, the company is really good at enforcing their policies and making sure everyone gets paid.

The money seems good, and it would definitely help take some pressure off your student loans, but ultimately, the biggest thing you’re struggling with is your moral compass.

People are willing to spend money for this kind of thing, and that’s entirely their choice to make, so it’s not like you’re extorting them or anything. Still… you wonder if it’s actually okay to profit off of someone else’s loneliness. You’ve never worked the kind of job that requires you to cater directly to another person’s emotions, and it kind of freaks you out.

But maybe Ava is right. There are all sorts of people in this world. Maybe some of them are just curious to try the app out. Maybe others just want to get their families off their back by pretending like they’re dating someone for a little while. There’s no way to discern everyone’s motivations, so perhaps there’s really no point in thinking about it at all. 

Most importantly, this could be a good thing for you. Life has been stagnant recently, and it’s true that you usually hesitate to put yourself out there. You’ll never learn what you do or don’t like if you keep on avoiding everything. This could be a chance to learn a lot about other people, but also, to learn more about yourself. 

Yeah. It’s time to stop overthinking for a change and just try something new. 

Thus, feeling unusually determined, you spend the rest of the day setting up your profile (finding nice selfies was the longest part of the whole ordeal), and with a resolved huff, you post it and officially go live on the app. 

You’re not really sure what you were expecting, but needless to say, there isn’t any immediate feedback. It probably takes a while for people to stumble across your profile, and even then, there’s no guarantee they’ll want to go out with you. 

I guess I was getting worked up for no reason. Certain people might find success with this kind of thing, but it’s probably not as easy as it looks. 

You scratch your cheek, suddenly sheepish over how needlessly excited you got earlier. You’re not used to stepping out of your comfort zone, so you must have gotten a bit carried away. 

For the rest of the evening, you set your phone aside and come back to reality. You get some homework done, make dinner, and by the time you’re ready for bed, you’ve pretty much forgotten about the whole thing altogether. 

That is, until you check and see that you’ve missed a notification.

“Huh? Someone viewed my profile and wants to message me?”

You’re undeniably taken aback. Not just because it’s happening a lot sooner than you expected, but also because it means that contrary to what you first thought, people are interested in you. 

Having minimal experience when it comes to dating and romance in general, you have to admit, the thought of being viewed as desirable is immensely flattering. 

Curious to see who wants to hire your services, you click on the user’s profile.

His name is Isaac, and he’s twenty-one years old, set to complete his undergraduate studies at the end of the year. He goes to a different university than yours, thankfully, because you can’t help but feel like it would be incredibly awkward to bump into him on campus after pretending to be his girlfriend. He’s studying to become a doctor, which means he’s still got a lot of school ahead of him, but you’ve always had a lot of admiration for people who are willing to commit to their goals and work hard. 

Also, even though you don’t want to sound shallow or anything… he’s really, really attractive. 

You frown. Granted, there’s more to a person than their appearance, but based on how he comes across in his profile and what his future career is, he doesn’t strike you as the type of person who would struggle to date someone.

But again, you can never know what’s going on in a stranger’s life. And there’s no real way to find out why he decided to join the app.

Apart from speaking to him directly, of course. 

[𝐃𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐫’𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬?]

>>[𝐘𝐄𝐒]

After a momentary delay, the screen loads into a messaging interface, allowing you to see what Isaac sent you and respond to him directly.  

You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times.

All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 

More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 

You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times. 

All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 

More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 

[𝐍𝐚𝐦𝐞]:

You’re admittedly a bit nervous, especially since you want to do a good job and avoid letting him down, but mostly, you’re feeling excited. All of this is uncharted territory for you, after all. Never in a million years would you have imagined taking on a job like this. 

And you really shouldn’t have.

You don’t know it yet, but this will be the cause of many, many regrets. 

Shit. I’m starting to have second thoughts. 

Even now, you still can’t believe you’re really going through with this. After talking to Isaac and ironing out the finer details, you agreed to join him for a family gathering and pose as his girlfriend. You expected for him to have quite a few requests, but luckily, he seems pretty laid back about the whole thing. The better portion of your conversation was spent on getting your stories straight so as not to incur any suspicion, and since you’ve always been a good student and a hard worker, you promptly memorized everything there was to know. 

And now, it’s finally time to put this plan in motion. 

“Hey,” Isaac greets. “[Name], right?”

It’s the evening, since his parents are hosting a dinner party. The event is supposed to be pretty casual, but you still dressed up semi-formal in the hopes of making a good impression. He never explicitly mentioned how strict his parents are, but since they’ve been on his case about getting a girlfriend, it never hurts to go the extra mile. 

"Hi, Isaac,” you smile. “It’s so nice to meet you.” 

“You, too,” he nods. He’s considerably taller than you, and every bit as handsome as his picture suggested. Unless his personality is god-awful (which you probably would’ve picked up on after messaging him for so long), you’ve got a good feeling that most girls would be interested in him.

Still, everyone is different. He might have really high standards, or maybe he wants to focus on his studies, or perhaps it’s just a case of having never met the right person. Whatever the reason may be, his parents shouldn’t be pressuring him to date someone, and if you have the means to help him out, you’ll happily do it. 

“You look really nice,” Isaac says. He tilts his head to the side. “I hope you didn’t feel like you had to dress up to impress anyone. The most important part is that they believe I’m seeing someone so that they finally ease up a bit.” 

“Oh, I just did this for my own peace of mind,” you reassure. “I made sure to memorize everything you told me in advance, so I’m confident I can convince them that we’re the real deal. Even though this is technically my first day on the job… I promise not to let you down.” 

You blush, feeling rather flustered. The idea of being someone’s hired girlfriend is still a lot to wrap your head around, and you certainly don’t want to make empty promises, but you have every intention of giving it your best shot. Isaac is in a stressful situation, and you’re resolved to do whatever you can to fix it. 

“Can’t wait to get this over with,” Isaac sighs. He opens the passenger door and gestures for you to step inside the car. “Don’t worry. I know you might be feeling a bit uneasy, but I promise I’m not a serial killer or anything like that. I won’t hold it against you if you have 911 ready on speed dial until we get to my parents’ house.” 

“I trust you,” you insist. “I’ve heard good things about this app, and it sounds like they take safety seriously. They’ve got your information in their system, after all. Plus, I can tell that you’re a nice guy. It’s just a gut feeling.”

“I appreciate it,” he smiles. “Anyways… I guess I’ve stalled for long enough. You can probably tell that I really don’t feel like going. But the sooner I get them off my back, the better.” 

“I’ll be the best girlfriend you can ask for,” you beam. 

It’s a promise to him, but also to yourself. You are committed to taking this new job seriously, and for the rest of the evening, you will do whatever it takes to blend into the role that’s been thrust upon you. There’s no reason to get worked up. At the end of the day, all of this is pretend. It won’t be anywhere near as complicated as a real relationship.

Right?

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[vampiresbloodx]

warnings: implied harassment, physical attacks, creepy men, stalking, possessive and obsessive, legal age gap, blood.

Older!ex!gf!Wanda still can't help but stalk you over the years of your breakup, she likes keeping an eye on you, she wouldn't necessarily call it stalking, she just wants to make sure your okay.

Otherwise she would make herself go insane.

She doesn't even care that you've got a new girlfriend, she will pay attention to her too. It just so happens that maybe she knows them, has met them, she just wants the best for you, is that so bad?.

Wanda knows everything about your current girlfriend. She certainly doesn't like her, nor approve of your relationship, she seems too nice, too sweet, like she tried to mother you, even when she's supposed to be dating you, which Wanda definitely doesn't like.

It was her that was always there for you, no matter what, she'd leave her job mid shift just to go make sure you are okay, she couldn't imagine anything bad happening to her baby.

The thought alone brought her an immense amount of anxiety, worry, fear, all mixed into one, and stress. All over you. Most people would say she's being dramatic, maybe, but none of them would understand her love for you.

It just so happens as she was keeping an eye on you, like she does daily, she follows you home from work as for some reason you choose to take either public transport or you walk since your apartment isn't that far, still, anything could happen.

Especially at night.

Wanda was right.

She has a bad feeling in her gut when she couldn't help but notice a stranger in a hood following you every time you crossed a street

She thought she was acting fast when she saw the stranger grab at you, her heart froze, Wanda had no choice, before she knew it she used all her strength to force the stranger off of you, and started punching them.

Blood.

There was blood.

And she heard your voice.

"w-wanda... He's out!, the police are on the way" you said, stepping closer to her. She looked in your direction, and she saw no fear in your eyes.

You like seeing her like this.

For you.

She tilted her head to the side, "when did they say they'll be here."

You looked puzzled, "uh 10 minutes...."

"by the time they could arrive, you could have gotten seriously hurt, or worse. But I won't let that happen."

Your breath caught in your throat.

You couldn't help but stare at her, not even moving as you watched Wanda beat the shit out of him, he couldn't even speak, or beg, you weren't even sure if he was still conscious.

When Wanda was satisfied enough with how much blood she was seeing, she finally stopped, backing away as she watches him fall.

"don't ever go near someone that doesn't belong to you ever again."

[starlight-bread-blog]

Why Lokius Should Have Been Canon

This is a sort of combo of two metas that didn't quite get point my across. Some parts will be copied directly, but there's a lot of original content. I will discuss the ship between Loki and Mobius, their place in the show, and the MCU at large. My focus for this meta won't be parallels or motifs, because these things border on well-written friendships. But there will be some of that.

Romance in the MCU

There are a lot of straight couples in the MCU. (Almost) Every main hero is in some heterosexual relationship, Loki included.

(That's not all, not remotely).

But in the LGBTQ+ department... uh.. I think it was mentioned that Valkyrie had a girlfriend... uh... America Chavez had a pride pin... and Loki:

One line. Queer experiences are never a focal point of a show/movie the same way heterosexual experiences are. And that needs to change.

Romance In the Show

Wrong, toxic, or unsuccessfu romantic love is a recurring theme in the show.

Sylki

Sylki was an icky relationship right off the bat. They are the same person. I can't find the post at the moment, but someone has pointed out in their post that them being the same person is referenced in every episode in season 1 (edit: here it is), which is when the romance took place. This made their romance uncomfortable for many viewers.

(Some consider Sylki a toxic relationship, but for this post, the topic is too large to handle with the nuance I'd like to handle it with).

When he's drunk, Loki compares love to a dagger, stating that it hurts you, but when you try to find strength in it, it's not real.

Which is exactly what happens. Sylvie pushes Loki into a portal and they never get back together.

The Love Triangle

In 02×03, Ravonna Renslayer is infatuated with Victor Timely, but he leaves her behind and betrays her when Miss Minutes told him to. One episode later, we discover that they were indeed an item, and established the TVA together. He Who Remains deleted her memories and they never rekindle their love.

Later in the episode, is the best example of "wrong" romance in the show. Miss Minutes, the AI clock, confesses her love to Viktor Timely. He, obviously, freaks out and shuts her off. Nothing ever comes of this.

Brad and Dox

This one is small, but a big indication to romance being a theme. In 02×01, we're shown this:

The gap in the age of the actors is uncomfortable, and a character in universe has this reaction to it. It is never mentioned again.

So what does all of this leave us with? Not much. None of this properly ties to the finale, or anything really. If I were to write the show I would cut a lot of this out, since it serves no purpose. But it does make you keep romance and its shortcomings in mind. The writers want it to be there, in the back of your head.

Loki and Mobius

Finally! I got to talk about them. The two people in question. First things first, who are they, together? They became really supportive, close friends.

Fans even drew parallels to Chaos & Order, which is a very important theme in Loki. But I'm not here to unpack them. These things don't necessarily make them in love. So what does make them in love? I'll present you my evidence, and you ask yourself,

Would it be valid to suggest romantic implications if a man and a women are:

1) Extremely thouchy with each other.

2) Riding on a tandem bike together.

3) Willing to suffer a fate worst than death for another.

4) Falling on each other after that^

5) Literally the Interrupted Declaration of Love trope. (Ex)

6) Being framed in a circle.

7) Waiting & giving permission to attack.

8) Fixing themselvs before seeing the other.

Of course yes. Maybe you think some of these are a strech, but ultimately, people would point out romantic connotations across the board. And I'm here, pointing them out right now. Some scenes between Loki and Mobius have romantic implications.

Conclusion

Loki is a queer protagonist in the MCU, a universe that lacks representation of queer experiences. His show constantlty reminded us of romance, sometimes for seemigly no reason. In the second season, they wrote him and his best friend with romantic implications. And then, nothing. It should not have been nothing. Lokius should have been canon.

[racco]

Hello this is my first request.. I was thinking could you Worte whenever you have time a Vergil x Fem/GN reader where he shows care to reader after battle in front of Dante and Nero leaving everyone speech less?

Vergil Sparda x fem!reader PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION

Hi sorry for being gone so long! I see you asked for an after battle story but I felt like writing 2 versions! I hope u like them both

♡care after battle♡

It had been a long and grueling battle, one that left Vergil Sparda and his girlfriend, [Reader], battered and exhausted. They had fought alongside Dante and Nero (surpringly their presence not necessarily minded by vergil) taking on an army of demons that threatened to overrun the human world.

As the dust settled and the last of the demons fell, Vergil turned to [Reader], concern etched on his face. "Are you alright?" he asked, taking her hand in his.

[Reader] smiled weakly, still catching her breath. "I'm fine," she said, squeezing his hand.

Vergil's eyes softened, and he leaned in to kiss her forehead. "I'm glad," he said, relief evident in his voice.

It was a small gesture, but one that didn't go unnoticed by Dante and Nero. They exchanged a look, surprised by the usually stoic Vergil's display of affection.

"Uh, what's going on here?" Dante asked, his eyebrows raised.

Vergil ignored him, instead turning to [Reader]. "Let's get you out of here," he said, taking her arm and helping her to her feet.

As they walked away, Dante and Nero looked at each other in shock. They had never seen their brother act so tenderly with anyone before.

"That was...unexpected," Nero said, breaking the silence.

Dante nodded, a thoughtful look on his face. "Yeah, it was. But I guess it just goes to show that even someone like Vergil can care about someone else."

As they made their way back to their base, Vergil kept a protective arm around [Reader], keeping her close to him. It was a small gesture, but one that spoke volumes about the depth of his feelings for her.

And as they walked, Dante and Nero couldn't help but feel a newfound respect for their brother (and father lol) , who had always been so distant and reserved. Maybe, they thought, there was more to Vergil than they had previously realized.

♡bonus story♡

Vergil had always been reserved and focused on his goals, but there was one person who had managed to break through his tough exterior: his girlfriend, [Name]. They had been together for several months now, ( which is hard to get to as is) Vergil found himself more and more in love with her every day.

One day, as they were walking through the streets of Red Grave City, Vergil and [Name] ran into Dante and Nero. Dante greeted them with a grin, but Nero looked a little uncomfortable - he still wasn't entirely sure what to make of Vergil.

As they chatted, Vergil noticed that Dante and Nero kept glancing over at him and [Name]. He could tell that they were curious about their relationship, and a part of him felt a little self-conscious.

But as they continued to talk, Vergil's love for [Name] began to overcome his reservations. Without thinking, he reached out and took her hand, interlacing his fingers with hers.

At first, [Name] looked surprised, but then a smile spread across her face. She leaned in and rested her head on Vergil's shoulder, and Vergil felt a warm sense of contentment spread through him.

Dante and Nero both looked a little taken aback by the display of affection. Dante raised an eyebrow, but then he grinned and clapped Vergil on the back. "Well, well, well," he said. "Looks like little bro's all grown up." (Vergil is the older twin lmao)

Nero looked a little uncomfortable, but he didn't say anything. Vergil could tell that he was still getting used to the idea of his father being back in his life - let alone having a girlfriend.

But Vergil didn't care. For the first time in a long time, he felt truly happy, surrounded by the people he cared about. And as he looked down at [Name], he knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, no matter what challenges they might face in the future.

As they continued to walk through the city, Vergil kept holding [Name]'s hand, and she leaned into him with a sense of contentment. Dante and Nero continued to chat with them, but there was a new sense of respect in their eyes, as if they had a newfound appreciation for the love that Vergil had found.

In the end, it was [Name] who broke the silence, squeezing Vergil's hand and looking up at him with a smile. "I love you," she said softly.

Vergil felt a warmth spread through him, and he leaned down to kiss her gently. He knew that there were still battles to fight and enemies to face, but with [Name] by his side, he felt like he could take on anything.

[centralperkchenford]

Chenford + early dating, some random guy at the station finds Lucy and Chris broke up and they try to ask Lucy out. Insert Sergeant Grumpy 😏

Chenford + early dating, some random guy at the station finds Lucy and Chris broke up and they try to ask Lucy out. Insert Sergeant Grumpy 😏

I hope you like this! 😏😏😏

(Find you a girl) Yeah, take it from me, that's the kind you need to find You just can't have mine

“Hey Officer Chen!” Lucy turns to see a patrol officer running towards her a nervous smile on his face. She frowns she doesn’t necessarily know all the patrol officers despite being pretty friendly and wanting to know her fellow officers so she took the time to get to know them. But this wasn’t one she recognized at all and wondered if he had just transferred in.

“Hi?” Says Lucy looking around her. There are a lot of people mulling around but none paying attention to her and she squints at his name tag.

Scott

“I know you and that district attorney were dating and I heard you broke up.” He says and Lucy reels back a little. She hadn’t told anyone about her break up with Chris except for Tim for obvious reasons. And Angela had stopped her and told her she was sorry for the break up but she deserved better than Chris

And she agreed with that because she was with Tim and he was ten times better.

But she didn’t realize that a random patrol officer knew, she couldn’t even fathom how he found out.

“Uh.” Says Lucy looking at him. “Yeah I did break up with him.” Officer Scott grins at her although he still looks nervous.

“I was just wondering since you are single now.” He starts and Lucy blanches. “I was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date.”

Before Lucy can even think of answering there’s a noise behind her and she knows without looking it’s Tim. Officer Scott doesn’t seem to notice him though his eyes are on Lucy’s face searching it intently.

“Well actually..” Lucy starts. I’m very much taken is what she wants to say but she doesn’t. Their relationship isn’t exactly in the open yet. Grey knows. Tamara knows and maybe there are suspicions but it’s not like they are going to go around the station and announce they are dating.

She just needs to let this guy down easy, and say thanks but no thanks.

Officer Scott looks hopeful and he bounces on his toes a little. “So is that a yes?” Tim growls behind her and she elbows him in the stomach causing him to grunt a little.

“No.” Says Lucy quickly. “I uh I’m seeing someone.” Officer Scott’s face falls and then his eyes flicker up to Tim and he pales.

“Oh that fast? Didn’t you just—” Officer Scott starts but Tim cuts him off.

“That’s none of your business is it Boot?” He says and Lucy hears a hint of her training officer in his voice.

“No sir see—” Officer Scott begins. Tim steps out from behind Lucy now and stands besides her. Lucy chances a glass at him knowing her boyfriend probably has his signature grumpy look on his face. He does

“Don’t you have a job to do?” Tim snaps and Officer Scott backs away a little bit and then turns on his heels and runs across the bullpen.

Lucy turns around to look at Tim an amused look on her face. “Wow.” She says. “Really gave him a run for his money huh.”

Tim mumbles something under his breath and Lucy tugs him away, her hand on his wrist. She leads him all the way to his office and shuts the door behind them.

“I don’t like when random guys flirt with my girlfriend.” He grumbles. Lucy rolls her eyes as he backs her against the door. She loops her arms around his neck, “He didn’t know I am your girlfriend.” She points out. Tim’s lips twitch a little bit. “Although I’m pretty sure he knows now.”

“He is annoying. I mean who asks someone out and then judges them for being with someone else right away?” Tim says rolling his eyes. “He just didn’t like that he can’t have you.”

Lucy raises her eyebrows at him and plays with the hair on the back of his neck. “Oh and you can have me?” She’s asks teasingly. “Are you sure about that?” Tim rolls his eyes but presses his forehead to hers.

“Yeah.” He says. “I am because not to sound like a possessive asshole but you are..” Lucy grins up at him knowing what he’s going to say. She brings her hands to the front of his face and brings him down to kiss her.

“Mine.” He whispers into her mouth and Lucy sighs happily. Usually the whole caveman possessiveness thing turned her off. But as she was slowly learning everything that turned her off with other men turned her on with Tim.

“Yours.” She agrees. And he kisses her again. She pulls him closer by his metro shirt and pats his chest when he pulls back. She searches his face so soft and vulnerable for her. “Mine.” She says putting her hand over his chest. He smiles and puts his hand over hers.

“All yours.” He agrees. She sighs softly, she had never felt this wanted, this protected in a relationship before especially so early on.

“So since I don’t have a hot date with Officer Scott tonight what does my boyfriend have planned tonight.” She asks a teasingly lilt in her voice because she loves to see Tim get riled up.

“Dinner.” He says leaning in to whisper and then he backs away. “I guess we will see how that goes.” Lucy hits his chest once and the twice and he catches her hands easily.

“You know what’s going to happen later.” He says and Lucy has bite her tongue to hold in the moan.

“Can you promise that Bradford or are you just teasing me?” She asks. He still has a hold of her hands. He drops them gently and then reaches around to open the door.

“I guess you will just have to wait and see.”

[my-castles-crumbling]

Uhh Hii so I saw a few people asking for advice in anons so uhm

you don't have to respond ofc, but I'd really appreciate some advice ^^ /gen

So I have a girlfriend and she's wonderful, she really is, but she told me she has a small crush on one of our mutual friends. And she also likes me, but here's where the problem comes in. I want to be supportive, but at the same time I don't know how to feel about this.

And she's talking about her crush on a group chat with me, and one of our other mutual friends she trusts about how her crush won't like her back, but then also says she shouldn't like our mutual friend because she's really happy with me.

And now I have no idea what to do so uhh. Yeahhh. I think she might be poly, Idk. But uh yeah thanks for taking the time to read through this <33

ooof, okay.

So I think I have to assume here that you are not poly? I'm going to go with that assumption.

Having a crush on more than one person doesn't necessarily make you poly. It just means you have feelings for more than one person. Poly means you want to ACT on those feelings. So I think you need to have an open conversation with your gf about what she wants. the problem is, it sounds like she doesn't know.

MY problem is, it sounds like she's not thinking about you at all during this whole thing. Like, for most people, it's going to be a bit hurtful to see their gf blatantly talking about liking someone else! Unless you've set the expectation that you ARE poly, then that's a bit frustrating.

So yeah. You guys need to talk. Set your boundaries. What does she want, what do you want, and do those things match? Because the sad thing is, if they don't, then even of you both like each other, you might not work out. And that's nobody's fault! She's allowed to want a poly relationship. But if you don't, that's okay, too. But PLEASE don't make compromises about your boundaries just to stay together. You'll just be unhappy.

Sending love and naming you genuine anon!

[mistfallengw2]

2 8 13 and 18 for lenorey👀

Hey, a sylvari ask game! 🌱

[under cut because it got long]

2. How much do they remember from the Dream?

She woke up from the nicest dream one could have, and then forgot all of it the moment her body left the pod. All BUT the fact she was consuming something that caused that bliss. Stolen from the sensation she left in the Dream, she was ravenous for it before she even opened her eyes, licking the pod's fluid on her lips and hands, then tasting the dirt and grass and everything in her reach before the menders could intervene to stop her.

-

8. Do they fit well into sylvari society or are they more at home with other races?

Sylvari society is... limited, in her opinion. Having her own people continuously stop her from fulfilling her search for that sensation felt offensive, and Lenorey left as soon as she made sure what she was looking for was not there. No other race is perfect, granted, but since they often write her "weirdness" off as a sylvari thing it's less annoying to her, and at least she gets to try out new things when she's around them. Heck, she found herself a cozy place in the Aetherblades despite not particularly caring about their mission or whatever. She just followed a charr after buying tonics from him, and he decided to take care of her and give her more funny drinks, and then she met that nice asura that gave her even more things to try!

-

13. How do they feel about death?

Mainly intrigued. It's not something she wants to experience asap (though with all the toxic stuff she eats one would understandably think otherwise) nor something she necessarily wants to cause (sorry little critters, some of you will have to be tasted), but due to being a necromancer she feels drawn to it in a way she can't explain, and her biology allows her to tap into certain powers more easily than most.

-

18. [Free space for 3 pieces of trivia about your sylvari!]

- During the Aetherblades' time in the Mists, Lenorey usually took care of the "killing your own copies" part of the fractals for Veeq and Bob. Tonics and her natural ability to tune things out helped deal with the off-putting nature of it, and sparing her girlfriend and sort-of-dad the pain was worth the relative trouble.

- The sensation she's looking for is the Blight harbingers inflict on themselves with elixirs, though it works differently on her due to her particular biology. She discovered it by stealing discarded prototypes made by Ankka and was ecstatic over finally feeling something close to what she remembered. Veeq agreed to begrudgingly cooperate with Ankka in order to try it for herself and then perfect a version for Lenorey. All to make your plant partner fulfill her weird metaphysical destiny and regain a lil' color in her leaves. That said, she's not immune to the Void corruption, and she found out the hard way that corrupted Dragonjade actively harms her, as that's far beyond what her "antitoxins" can deal with. Beyond following her lil' family, Lenorey's main reason to join the fight against the Dragonvoid was to preserve what's essentially her Wyld Hunt.

- Despite being around them, like, 90% of the time, even Bob has no idea about when Lenorey and Veeq became a thing. At one point during the escape in the Mists, he simply found them hidden behind supplies below deck, cuddling in an unequivocal way while asleep, and he hasn't asked questions he doesn't want answered. To be fair, they don't know exactly either. While they were still at the Aetherblade base, Veeq studied the sylvari's particular biology to perfect her antiserum, but Len wasn't the easiest consensual test subject to deal with, as she liked to be playfully disruptive and touch things she wasn't supposed to... including asuran lips. One thing led to the other for, uh, totally scientific reasons, but their relationship solidified when Veeq was taking the whole "we're on the run in another dimension and I was tricked into aiding war crimes opposed to my life's research" thing more badly than she could show and Lenorey was just... there for her, in her weird loopy way.

(I didn't want to repeat some already posted trivia, but I noticed I had more >:3)

[eighthdoctor]

Same anon who sent in the ask about kink culture on Azeroth wayyy back in November, back at it like 2 months later (uh oops lol) with a follow-up question: in the answer to my previous ask you went a bit into how in certain cultures on Azeroth there are aspects of BDSM that are considered more normalized (the main example you gave was orcs being into heavy S/M stuff), and I was hoping you would be willing to go into that whole idea a bit more *but* revolving around the Quel’dorei specifically. Part of what I’m trying to get at here is that in the answer to my second question you went into how Jaina’s cultural upbringing influences her views on kink, so now I’m curious about where Sylvanas is coming from in all this.

Yo! Two links for context for everyone else:

Kink culture on Azeroth

Sylvanas's approach to relationships (...NSFW)

So here's two things about the quel'dorei: They're very long lived, and they have a complicated, hierarchical society.

Obviously you can take this in a number of directions but here's my proposal: The quel'dorei predominantly self assort into either sequential monogamy (a series of partners but only one at a time) or monogamy with extra-pair mating (long term relationship with one person and periodic, less intense flings on the side).

Why not more typical polyamory? Because of that hierarchy/formality. We're all super aware that any polycule is going to involve copious amounts of drama over who takes precedence and it ends up looking like you dropped a ball of string. Not that there aren't quel'dorei in polycules and throuples, but standard is you have a primary partner and then may have additional flings.

In these relationships someone is Assigned Dom By Society. Someone is in charge. It is common for this to be kinky and sexual but that's not essential; on the other hand someone does pay when they go out to eat. A certain amount of dictating your partner's choices is typical.

Sylvanas being a Windrunner, the expectation is that of course she's going to be the dom. The only family she could date where that would be questionable would be the Sunstriders and, well, political nonsense. This would be more problematic if she weren't who she is, but Sylvanas has had control issues from day one so the ability to dictate the relationship from the get-go is incredibly appealing to her.

It is perfectly normal and unsurprising then that Sylvanas has a revolving door of girlfriends. It's a little odd that they're so time-bound (only when she's in Silvermoon, never when she's on duty) and that she shows no signs of slowing down on this, but absolutely no one cares that she has a new girlfriend every year or that she openly flaunts them as a new possession.

(Similarly, the only thing gossip-worthy about Kael'thas's revolving door of partners is that so many of them are human. Again the expectation is that he'll eventually pick one--a quel'dorei, please--to sire an heir on but otherwise, of course he keeps coming home with another Kirin Tor student on his arm, paying their way, buying them clothing and other gifts, introducing them to all the biggest names, then dumping them and moving on. Some combo of sugar daddy, mentor, and 24/7 dominant.)

(This isn't intrinsically an abuse of power, in a society where this is normal and there are other forms of social support if your partner does turn out to be a dickwad, HOWEVER one, he's the prince and two, in no way does he communicate the expectations here to Jaina so like. Still a dick.)

The stereotypical traditional quel'dorei relationship--equivalent to a 50s marriage, aka very few people now OR then actually lived this but it exists in cultural consciousness--veeery very closely resembles a 24/7 D/s relationship.

It's not that the dom is necessarily making major life choices without other input, but like, if they go out to eat, one person is ordering the food for both of them. It's a little gesture, an easy way to signal rank, I'm taking care of you, I'm protecting you--it helps that the higher ranked individual is also presumed to be more socially adept, I am literally making sure you don't make any social faux pas, I will provide a buffer against other people being assholes.

Does Sylvanas expect this in a relationship with Jaina? No. Lmao. This is Jaina.

Buuuuut as alluded to early on (very, very alluded to, Sylvanas is not acknowledging she's doing this), she does have a drive to care and provide for her partner, she wants to feed Jaina, give her things, watch over her, these are all very hard-coded (biologically and culturally) quel'dorei things that put her in the role of the dominant, which somewhat scans but not totally.

Now the sex: Total high protocol bullshit, as Jo summarized it.

There are named positions. There are orders and punishments. There's a reasonable amount of degradation and objectification. Branding/tattoos/piercing are fairly common in long-term relationships. Lots of D/s obviously, lots of discipline, with S&M and bondage as less common but still present trends.

Not that you'll see someone on a leash on the streets of Silvermoon (any more than you would in, say, LA) but you will see someone walking a half step to the side and behind their partners and holding that position, checking in before talking to others, etc.

Anyway this plays out in fic for Sylvaina so I'm not going to go too into details but. Yeah. I'll probably reblog this closer to fic-end when it gets REAL funky.

[aromantisk-fagforening]

The front bottoms be like

I am having a panic attack

Breathing exercises

I deserve bad things

Violent shit be going down

dissociation (?) (I mean it's only outright in one but like. it's potentially there in many)

Feelings / expressing them / resentment / feeling better / jealousy

magic (tea leaves, crystal ball, voodoo magic)

Multiple things are happening at the same time :(

change :(

can you stay

growing old / ageing

death / dying / funerals

faking nothing being wrong

Flips (front flip / backflip)

Some things are universal

weather / seasons (winter, summer, rain, cold, off-season)

water (incl. lots of swimming)

cops/police

sleep

stories / media / entertainment / expression

phone

question(s)

names / nicknames

eyes

clothes / tattoos

convenience

places (mostly in the US) (France, "foreign countries", Alaska, California, West Virginia, Rhode island, New Mexico, Pennsylvania, Florida, Georgia, New Jersey, Jersey, Baltimore, Paris)

(new) friends / best friend

I learned about this thing with people

drugs with friends, his girlfriend, just him solo or his girlfriend solo (beer, wine, drinks , weed, LSD, menthol cigarettes, 'some new drug', "drugs", overdose)

You know that time you said ___ / memory

Sometimes ___

I am better/nicer than you think I am

Please help me

I care about you!! talk to me if you need anything / I will help you

you have it worse than me

Living together / homes

You are into me, I am not into you

you like(d) this other guy

I am deeply in love with you

sex

This relationship* isn't going very well

*not necessarily romantic (but often)

also there's that one (1) song about cults but I guess that's not a tendency at that point. (it's called tighten up).

Also I have no idea how to classify Pale Beneath The Tan. Uh it's about something I guess. Also Don't Fill Up On Chips is like ?? idk what it's about. Batman is also one i'm uncertain about, but mostly cause I have barely heard it twice.

Another one that sticks out is Awkward Conversations. It does fall under "drugs" but it interestingly uses therapy speak or whatever. ("I personally think it's too cold to have the window open"). (emphasis taken from the song)

Oh! also Ginger doesn't really fit the mold. "this is my body, the only thing I own entirely"

[authoratmidnight]

So, I’ve noticed, a lot, that ppl comment about how ‘demons didn’t have the concept of friends before Iruma’.

Except, that’s *clearly* not true, if only because, for a civilized race you would have to have the concept of ‘person I like/get along with/enjoy spending time with’ cause like. That’s kind of the first step to making babies and not going extinct lol You kind of need to get along with people to fuck to make and raise kids(since the other option is that everyone is produced by rape which is uh, really dark and clearly not the case). And like, just looking at adults like, Balam and Kalego, or Dali and Suzie, it’s pretty clear that they DO in fact understand the concept of getting along with each other, or having a person that you enjoy spending time with/getting along with.

It was the WORD “friends” that tripped up Azz and Clara and, well everyone else.

But then it gets confusing b/c also hear characters who either had not met Iruma or before they met Iruma, using the word friends(like Gaap talking about wanting to ‘make 100 friends’). So I did some digging and well. Ironically this is a case of stuff being lost in translation, much like Iruma using the word ‘friends’ to Azz and Clara.

See. In Japanese the word Iruma used was 友達 (tomodachi). Which does indeed mean ‘friend’, which is the one we see other characters tripping over and saying slowly as if they’ve never heard it before. Meanwhile, the word we see/hear other characters using is 仲間 (nakama)-when Gaap was taking about making ‘100 friends’ he used the word nakama, お仲間100). Which ALSO is frequently translated as “friend”. Except, it doesn’t mean that, not always.

From doing some digging, ‘nakama’ has a different connotation than ‘tomodachi’. Nakama (as best as my research can find) is someone with a shared goal or someone you do something with. You can be a nakama without being a friend.

For example, your coworker could be a 仲間, you are doing things together and, depending on the job, may have the same goal (an example I saw used was buddy cop movies/shows), but you don’t necessarily have to be *friends* with that person.

I worked together on group projects with classmates in college, that would make them my nakama. But I wouldn’t really have considered them friends, they were not my tomodachi.

They’re similar words but with different meanings. There is for sure an overlap between the two no doubt, if you made a venn diagram with nakama on one side and tomodachi on the other they would overlap, but they wouldn’t be a circle.

友達 is 'friend,' with many of the ambiguities that accompany the English word 'friend.' People wonder what true friendship is (真の友情), the line between just a friend and a bff (友達と親友) or the line between the friendzone and boyfriend/girlfriend (お友達と恋人).

仲間 is a relationship to people in the same group that has a shared goal or do something together. You can be 仲間 with a person who isn't a friend. 仲間 is often defined by common enemies and/or outsiders.

Source [X]

But, since both of these words are often translated as “friends” it lends to, a LOT of confusion (in this instance, allies or companions would as a better translation for 仲間, to help remove some confusion). It doesn’t help that ‘friends’ is itself, a fairly vague word and can mean anything from ‘this person whom i like/get along with’ to ‘this person that i’ve known for years and trust with my life’.

Also like,just cause one does not have the word for something, doesn’t meant hat they don’t have/understand the concept of it. It happens all the time irl where one language has a word for a specific thing, while another language does not but still understand the concept of it. Which is clearly what’s happening here. They don’t know the word ‘tomodachi’, but they DO understand the concept to a degree and know what a ‘nakama’ is.

It’s quite entertaining to me that, much like how ‘tomodachi’ is lost in translation between Iruma and his friends, the tomodachi/nakama distinction is lost in translation from Japanese to English.

And then Nishi decided to really make it confusing by throwing in 親友 (shinyu) and making translators scream lmao.

edit to add: ALSO, we DO have to r3emember that the two people he first explained the concept of ‘tomodachi’ to were Clara and Azz, who definitely did not have any tomodachi or nakama before Iruma so it makes sense that would be very confused by what he was explaining.

[ultimumvitae]

headcanon: shadow as a romantic partner

*Note: My portrayal of Shadow is demiromantic meaning he does not feel romantic attraction toward people until he has formed a strong emotional connection with them.

Shadow frankly doesn't really understand the difference between a romantic partner and a close friend. If he gets along well enough with the person then chances are that he would date them if they asked. Which is to say... he also probably isn't ever going to be the one to ask someone else out. To him, there's not a huge difference and boyfriend/girlfriend is just a title with some added responsibilities as being someone's "official person".

Would be a very attentive boyfriend, if quiet and blunt. If his partner needed something, he would get it no questions asked.

Memory issues make it hard for him to remember things like anniversaries and birthdays, but he's reliably punctual when it comes to things he needs to remember in shorter terms like dates.

He's gotten better but he's still not the best at communicating his feelings unless he deems it necessary and/or urgent. If he seems broody or upset, he's not going to talk about it with his partner unless they ask.

Worries about his partner's health and while not necessarily the jealous sort without good reason, he does tend to be over-protective. God help the person who flirts with, harasses, upsets, or hurts his partner.

If his partner cheats on him, he'll be understandably upset but will confront them to see if their relationship is worth salvaging or drop them. He doesn't have the emotional energy to waste on people who don't have the care enough to respect him. (But if his partner tells him they like the idea of him being jealous... well, he might play along.)

His gifts are always thoughtful.

His primary love languages are acts of service and quality time.

He sucks at cooking, but that's mostly because he's never had to learn beyond the utmost basics. He'll still try to cook things for his partner regardless, or set out to order their favorite foods at the very least.

His partners WILL get motorcycle rides wherever they like.

His favorite activity to do with partners is stargaze. Those moments feel vulnerable to Shadow, and sharing the night sky with someone else feels like sharing some small, delicate part of himself.

He isn't really romantic in an intentional way. He sort of stumbles into romance by doing things he'd normally do because they're logical. Bringing you flowers? He saw you looking at them and knew you had been sad lately. Opening doors for you? He's just being polite, and also he was walking ahead of you, this makes getting to your destination quicker. Staring at you longingly? Uh, actually he was probably thinking about something else. Probably. That might change in time, though, in longer relationships. Shadow isn't dense, he can be a quick learner and he's decent at listening to what his partner needs. If he notices that certain actions, words, or looks make his partner happier, then chances are he'll also learn to be a little more romantic, too.

[thekrows-nest]

(anon)

I was going to ask - if Dove harming innocents would give even Krow pause - what would happen if for some mad reason Dove went after Luke and Jazzy? *kicks Dove’s ass for it* wtf Dove why

But I do have an idea. Three possibilities actually, with varying likeliness.

So I’ve been thinking on Mary who hasn’t got much attention yet. Hmm. I am curious about what her job is?

I might have an idea of her big regret. Maybe. I suspected and the info that came next did kind of strengthen the line of thought.

TW: abuse

I don’t know how intensely religious or strict her raising was. Or whether she experienced homophobia, whether racism was directed at her girlfriend Camila, or whether those precipitated moving to the city. (Mary moved a decent distance away at an older age than people traditionally finish school or leave home/age out of care/become independent, implying that something may have happened. The city is also a safer place to be out.)

I’m hoping for Mary’s sake that the move was mostly about broadening her horizons. Maybe Camila encouraged Mary to have a fresh start, or her second income made moving affordable.

But yeah :( I think Mary is processing some painful controlling crap. Maybe even just memories. You did say she was very sheltered, that the environment taught things that were hateful and not Christ-like. Distinct possibility of religious trauma and homophobia.

I think she’s possibly also coming to terms with her actions and beliefs while she was deep in the religion she was raised in. Everything is in a harsh new light.

Now she’s questioning her faith she realises that she harmed someone in the past through following those teachings. It’s also possible she left them behind in that environment… or yes, failed them. (There’s nasty corollaries implied in that.) There are a few ways in which that could have played out but there’s not enough info to narrow it down.

In extreme cases she may even have cut or lost contact so she can’t see this person to apologise. Whether she wouldn’t be allowed to, it’s not safe to go back, or she doesn’t know where they are!!! It’s possible that the person she feels she failed is her younger self. But maybe not… /Krowspiracy theory

In writing it out I, uh, yeah, now have a Krack theory about her raising/childhood

Or maybe I’m completely on the wrong track! I’m spinning elaborate webs rather than asking for facts.

Everything I come up with is kind of reaching, potentially spoilers if somehow right, or baseless. I’m connecting dots that might not be there. Best to wait for more info.

There’s a lot unknown about her family, her school, relationships and timelines.

Krowspiracy anon. Bruh. Why do you hurt me like this?

Now, as for if, for some ungodly maddening reason, Dove were to go after not just Luke BUT also Jazzy. Yeah, Krow is NOT having that. He may not necessarily kill Dove, but he would incapacitate them and immobilize them. They would DEFINITELY be extra secure in the cage. "Y-you didn't leave me a c-choice. I d-do love you. But. I love them t-too. Even if it's you, I will never, NEVER, let h-harm come to them."

As for Mary and her job, I see her as working at a cozy bookstore or the like. One of the things she did a lot growing up was reading (even if what she could read was limited), and once she's gone out on her own, a whole world of literature was opened up to her. So she consumes all kinds of books with ravenous delight.

As for the other points...

You've really nailed a lot of points. Krowspiracy Anon strikes once again.

I'll give you some little crumbs as a treat, and for you to muddle on for your next krack theory.

Mary comes from a large family. Large family. And it has a major role into her upbringing, her personality, and ties into her... regretful feelings.

[bohemian-rhapsody-in-blue]

tarot questions: the magician, the moon, the lovers, the empress.

Ah, a romantic Anon! Let me do my best to answer these questions with my absolute dearth of romantic feelings or experience…

The Magician: Have you ever written a poem or song about somebody else?

Yes, but never ones I’d show to anyone else (subject of the poem or otherwise).

Unless you count this poem I wrote about Chris Pine when I was 12:

I pine for Chris Pine!

I want him to be mine!

I think he’s rather fine,

And really quite divine!

And when the stars align,

Chris Pine will be mine!

And when I learn he’s taken…

I WHINE ABOUT CHRIS PINE!!!

That’s so far in the past at this point that it’s circled back from being cringey and embarrassing to being…well, still cringey and embarrassing, but I can laugh about it and share it with others. (And even then I wasn’t writing it completely in earnest—it was meant to be funny and badly-written.)

The Moon: Have you ever written a love letter?

Nope. Never really had occasion or reason to. (Not even fan mail to Chris Pine!)

The Lovers: Do you have a crush?

Yes! He’s tall, and dark-haired, and has a lovely low voice, and he’s 27 years old (a little old for me, I know), and he works as a bounty hunter in space and his name’s Spike Spiegel and…

Okay, fine. In all seriousness, no. I’ve had lots of fictional and celebrity crushes (Chris Pine among them!), but never a crush on a real, attainable person. And anyway, looking back, I feel like a lot of those fictional and celebrity crushes were actually just obsessive/hyperfixation feelings I wasn’t sure how to label. Like, I don’t think I actually had a crush on Harry Potter at age 10, I think I was just obsessed with the Harry Potter series in general.

The Empress: Do you think you will ever get married?

Oh, God. Uh. Maybe????

I would love to get married and start a family someday. I read romance novels or watch rom-coms and it just makes me want a partner, if only to feel all the happy romantic feelings I’ve been missing out on. I watch the happy little kids on Bluey or read parenting magazines/advice columns (a weird hobby of mine) and it reiterates to me how much I’d like to raise children someday, even though I’m terrified of the possibility of messing them up. I do want that in my future. (I don’t necessarily want to have sex or be pregnant, though; if I do have kids, I plan to adopt them.)

BUT, right now, marriage isn’t really something I can envision. Getting married to someone typically necessitates falling in love first, right? And I’ve never even had a crush, much less fallen in love, much less had someone I could call a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner or initiated a kiss. And sometimes this worries me—like I’m losing track of the trajectory to Adulthood™️ and at this rate I won’t find a life partner at the Normal, Expected Adult Age™️. I mean, obviously, as I said in the tags of this post, I’m not expecting to have found the one when I’m only 20, but haven’t most people my age had at least one relationship or crush? Felt something? Haven’t they at least had some practice?

But the thing is…as I currently understand it, romance, or those “happy romantic feelings I’ve been missing out on,” isn’t something you can control. You can’t turn it on and off at will like a faucet; you can’t just decide to have romantic feelings for someone. Trust me, if I could, I would have! This is why my current conception of my sexual identity is “asexual???????”, complete with all those question marks—maybe the clichés are right and I am just a late bloomer, or I haven’t found the right person yet.

And I hate the idea of spending the rest of my life waiting, and waiting, and waiting for that ever-elusive and possibly nonexistent “right person” to come along; trying to get those romantic feelings (that sound so wonderful in books!) to stir up in me when I’m not sure they even can. But at the same time, I don’t want to completely cut off the possibility of romance in my future, or just have a marriage of convenience/for tax benefits. And I never, ever, ever want someone to pressure me into doing romantic or sexual things with them after I have made it very clear that I don’t feel that way. Never.

So I guess all I can do for now is keep reading those romance novels, and wonder, and wait.

[Tarot Questions]

[howdy-is-canon]

ok SO…………… imagine a world where howard and andy met while howard and carolyn were still together.

we have to think about the stage of howard's life that he was in at this time: he does NOT know that he's aro OR ace, so, uh, this changes a lot already because beforehand, he had already split up with carolyn, and had realised he was aroace, prior to meeting andy, which is why he ends up helping andy to realise his identity also. this doesn't necessarily need to change cuz howard can still realise hes aroace, break up with carolyn, and thru discussions and coming to terms with it himself, this would still help andy to come to the same conclusion about himself. i do think it's harder for andy to figure it out for himself considering he's not been in a relationship as such, ever, so it's one of those, “maybe i haven't found the right person” or “maybe i just need to experience it to understand” things… 

anyway let us consider the DYNAMICS here because…. much to consider here… it does resemble a sort of love triangle, if we're gonna be typical and romantic, but i feel this situation is neither of those things, so, lol. this is a dude in a relationship with a friend he's never been attracted to out of a feeling of obligation, realising he's a whole other orientation, ending it, and simultaneously building a friendship with someone else, and over a course of months to years coming to realise the kind of relationship that would work for him that happens to be with this guy. not like, sorry carolyn, i met someone else. lol. it would have ended regardless.

so anyway… probably howard DOES tell carolyn like, oh i trained up someone new today, he's called andrew, he seems nice but terrified. carolyn probably jokes about howard being the one to scare him, on account of his :| vibes, and howard admits he wasn't thrilled to have to train someone and it may have come across at first but he decided he likes this guy and hopes he didnt make him feel bad……… 🥺 

so two things are happening here: howard and andy are building a friendship, goofing around, laughing about carrot pants; and howard and carolyn are. i dunno. not doing that. i think they've been getting on fine but everything kind of immediately changed when they went from friends to “dating” and he felt pressure to be a certain kind of person to her now, what is a boyfriend, what do boyfriends do, am i being affectionate enough, etc. which he kind of blamed on Society or something at first before he realised most people WANT to do those things and aren't secretly lamenting them. and, gasp, that's why they form romantic relationships. 

AND. okay this feels bad. but when i was with tom i never mentioned him to people. my family obviously knew and i did sometimes talk about him, but not much, and mostly for functional purposes lol. i remember i was working at pearson the year i met louie when me and tom broke up, and i remember telling tom about louie, but i couldnt bring myself to say the word “boyfriend” out loud so i never mentioned tom to louie LOL uhh……. i can see howard just never really bringing up that he has a girlfriend until they break up. tbh. and probably he's acting spaced out at work after it happens, and andy's like, hey what's up. and howard is like umm. it's hard to explain.

and he's probably like. idk if they talk about it AT work, maybe andy asks howard at lunch or, when they're just standing around at some point lol. somewhere a little more private ya know, in the back. i know how supermarkets work……… and howard's like ok so…… i was kind of… in a relationship… i know it's probably weird that i didnt mention it before now, but it's because, umm. okay, this is gonna sound crazy, (it's fine, says andy) but, ok, we were friends in school, right, and i don't really know why that changed, because i don't think i ever actually saw her as anything else, but, i mean it was her that… expressed an interest… and i guess i just went along with it ‘cause that's how it goes, or so i thought, and it's a bit stupid really ‘cause we were actually really good friends until then. and like, i don't know if we will be again. now. ‘cause, fair enough, she didn’t take it very well.

andy: what did you tell her…?

howard: dunno, i just fuckin’, uh, had a mental breakdown or something and she kind of got the picture. (he’s kind of laughing at himself in a bemused way lol) … and then she asked me if i was gay. and i'm like, i don't fuckin’ know. i don't think i'm anything.

andy: that seems a weird thing to ask.

howard: well, okay. don't think anything of this, but, i don't make friends very often, so the fact i've brought you up a handful of times in conversation is apparently a good reason to think i've been secretly gay this whole time. which if i am, then it's a secret to me an’ all.

andy: wait, did i come up in your break-up conversation with your girlfriend?

howard: look, it's her that brought it up. (he kinda shrugs and holds his hands up here)

andy: no, it's fine, just… (i think andy is trying not to laugh here. very serious conversation.) it feels a bit like i'm part of a love triangle or something. 

howard: yeah, ya homewrecker. it's all your fault.

andy: i will not be held responsible for this!

howard: nah. it would've ended anyway.

andy: you're still making it sound like i had anything to do with this.

howard laughs at this. an exasperated little chuckle. i was going to say he runs a hand through his hair but this is, in fact, buzzcut era howard we're talking about. probably he just rubs his fuzzy head a bit lol.

howard: no, i know.

andy: are you doing okay, though?

howard: yeah… it's all good. thanks. sorry to bring you into it.

andy: don't be! i asked.

howard: yeah, but, just the stuff carolyn said about you.

andy: well that was her, not you. but i'd rather know about it than not.

howard: okay. fair.

i guess it trails off after this. but more conversations will be had i am sure. andy would check in with howard the next time they see each other. at some point there would be a conversation about howard's guilt over not being what carolyn wanted, and he felt “like a right dickhead” for pulling the whole it's not you it's me, thing, but it literally IS him and not her, it's what HE lacks. and andy says something about how howard doesnt owe anyone feelings he simply does not have and it's kind of absurd to think otherwise. 

as for how howard and carolyn's relationship is faring at this point — probably they've occasionally messaged each other and intended to stay friends. after the initial upset i think she does say she just had to process it and it's not his fault he feels like he does, but she doesn't understand why he ever thought it was a good idea to start going out if he never felt that way about her. he's been unpacking this himself before this conversation. he says he just liked her, and cared about her, and he thought that's what that was, and had nothing else to compare it to. he says, he doesn't want her to think he didn't care about her just because it wasn't in the right way. he's probably getting a little bit upset, a little bit agitated at this point. at the way he is. at how it just could never have worked, and it's his fault.

i actually don't know at what point the words aromantic or asexual first come up. i've had it that howard was the first one to adopt these labels, although he's less of a googler than andy, but it makes sense because stan's his brother and he's up to date on all the lingo and his friend rees is aroace don't you know. and howard does talk to stan about things. perhaps in more detail than with andy at this point since they hadn't really known each other for that long yet.

i think i still like it how it was; howard figures it out, tells andy at some point, bla bla bla, time passes. thoughts are percolating in andy's brain. months go by, he's started university, he's feeling how different he is to everyone (it's the autism, baby! get ready!), there's that thing about that guy who tries to flirt with him and he tells him he's already taken cuz he doesn't want to straight up reject the guy, and maybe a little bit for clout (he thinks, okay, well i have no friends here but at least they will know that i have someone outside of this place!)... and howard does come over a few times, and he is assumed to be the boyfriend, and i dont know yet how andy ends up explaining this one, but i think howard has a grand old time pretending to be andy's boyfriend lol. 

perhaps……… in classic sitcom fashion…… this leads to howard playing the part, putting an arm around andy, messing up his hair, giving him a widdle kiss on his widdle head 👉👈 and this is how they kind of get used to these casual touches. and maybe, just maybe, andy is SO touch-starved, and howard is kind of lamenting how these kinds of interactions seem to be exclusive content reserved only for those in romantic relationships. and maybe they talk about it a little bit. maybe they shyly admit to each other how they think it feels kinda nice. and maybe andy clarifies he's never felt any romantic feelings for anyone either, he is pretty sure, just in case howard was worried about that. and maybe the fake-dating scenario is actually the catalyst for all of Howdy. imagine that. wwooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaauuuuhkghg dying noises

also not sure how carolyn sits within all of this. i'm sure her and howard are talking a lot less, but still talking. probably they meet up now and again, as before. it seems okay, but howard probably actually finds it really hard to bring up andy, because! now i see the drama. if she realises howard and andy end up in some kind of a committed relationship, regardless of whether it's romantic or platonic or whatever the hell, i feel she may lose her mind lol. she’d probably be retrospectively filling in the blanks of what led to her and howard's ultimate demise, even though as i said, it really did not have anything to do with andy and would’ve always happened. but she would blame it on andy and think howard a liar. i imagine it could turn into a bit of a fight. she's calling him a liar and saying she felt bad for him and all this time it WAS because he met someone else. and howard is riled by this and asks WHY she felt bad for him, is it because he can't feel romantic love? does that make him worthless? is that the only thing that makes a person worth anything? 

(insert moses sumney “doomed” lyrics because im still insane about that song: if lovelessness is godlessness, will you cast me to the wayside? well i feel the peeling of half-painted ceilings reveal the covering of a blank sky)

(in fact another moses sumney lyric, from “don't bother calling”, which kind of encapsulates howard's guilt around not being enough for carolyn: i don't know what we are, but all i know is i can't go away with you with half a heart)

(i need a separate document just for moses sumney lyrics. but like. howard before he finds his little situation with andy mood, from “me in 20 years”: i'm left wondering if it's written on my urn that i'd burn alone like a star

(btw this is not howard's kind of music but i think andy would like it and i think it would absolutely murder him lyrically, and then he would show it to howard and it would murder howard as well. lol. anyway literally not relevant right now.)

umm… so maybe this is the bitter end of howard's friendship with carolyn, probably not, but at least it can never be how it was again. there is the potential for carolyn to learn and understand, but i don't know if this happens while they are friends. as i say, once howard unpacks some trauma, i think that carolyn not Getting It is not the biggest issue anymore. i think seeing her after this point would literally send him into some kind of a panic attack honestly. 

we know that at some point howard and andy decide to explore some intimate acts LOL i’m such a prude just say sex. but not really tho. they don't get very far. anyway i don't know if this is the trigger for the delayed-onset ptsd or no. i mean, probably? which means that howard and carolyn could have been friends still for several years until he simply has to cut ties with her. but perhaps it's been tapering off anyway. he's probably been feeling kind of weird about it for a long time and probably somewhere deep in the bowels of his mind he has known that he’s only been continuing their friendship to compensate for how he couldn't be the thing that she wanted, and he thinks he at least owes it to her to be a good friend. he's just like me fr.

and then… and then… i think that’s enough for now

[gatheringbones]

[“On our very first date, which I didn’t really understand was a date until we were making out in my rental car, Ishai made the most exceptional request of me. He said: “Tell me about your constellation of intimate people.”

I had never been asked that before. People had, over the years, frequently asked me “How many people are you involved with, exactly?” based on my relatively public life as a polyamorous person, but they usually turned out to be asking only one of two things. Either they wanted to know if there was any room on my dance card for them, or they wanted to know just how big a slut I really was. Sometimes, both.

Ishai’s request, like a lot of the other early indicators about him, was a breath of fresh air. I loved it because it acknowledged and put (thoughtful and lyrical) words to the thing I constantly wrestled with when people asked me questions about my relationships. Namely, that there were people with whom I was very intimately engaged, and people with whom I sometimes had sex, and people who were both, but that sex did not necessarily equal Important Life Person. In fact, over the course of my adult life, my constellation of intimates has been fairly evenly split between people who are or have been lovers and people with whom I have never gone to bed or even come close. I typically had to go the long way around in explaining this, first stating my values around monogamy, friendship and friend networks, and community enmeshment before eventually—if the poor sucker was still listening—talking about my entanglements and intimacies. I never stopped finding it odd that even the most vocal proponents of non-traditional relationship structures typically listed only their lovers as people with whom they were “in a relationship.” In retrospect, though, the difficulties of language really do impose themselves on that conversation and a lot of these others: we know to say “this is my husband,” and even “this is my husband’s girlfriend,” but whatever’s not culturally valued doesn’t get its own words (which is, in some ways, the theme of this whole collection).

So this new, charmingly phrased, and quite sincerely stated request both startled and soothed me. I found myself talking animatedly about the people of whom I am so fond; my boyfriend Bobby and inimitable femme friend Hanne, my partner-in-crime Turner and my good boy Zev, and Kate, my longest love. He didn’t ask which of them I was getting naked with, and I don’t think I elaborated. I just happily chattered on about how much I liked them and why. Then, when I was finished, I asked the same of him in return. It was a great pleasure (and, I would like to say for the record, was a significant contributing factor to the making-out that shortly followed).

I’m reminded of this conversation every time someone asks me to tell them about my family. This happens to me all the time and for assorted reasons, but most often it’s related to my public work. Frequently, the questioner is fishing a little to see if I have any difficult stories about being queer or trans within my family of origin, since that’s the most common trope of media coverage of trans people: the terrible part. When I start waxing rhapsodic about the wonderful people in whose orbit I happily make my homes, they interrupt me. “No,” they say, looking chagrined. “I, uh ... I meant your real family.” When this happens, I prompt them with the phrase “family of origin,” and they nod and repeat it gratefully, but honestly, I’ve already soured on them. I’m tired of the pity narrative, and I lose patience quickly when it’s all someone can think to ask about.

Sometimes, though, the question-asking comes from the flipside. These folks are often the parents of young trans or gender-independent kids, and they are spiky with fear and anxiety that their children won’t have the kind of life that those of us who are parents envision for our children; ones with gainful employment, a sweetheart, friends. Some constructions of this future are incredibly rigid and some are tender and flexible, but they all seem to feature the same basic components: belonging, being loved, feeling successful. For these people, my long digression on the wonders of my chosen family—both the closest people and also the folks who are family to me even if we’re less often in touch—feel as reassuring to them as they are satisfying to me.”]

s. bear bergman, from blood, marriage, wine, & glitter